I'm officially a Youtuber now, I failed a video promise. I'm fine with it though, since if I were to have uploaded it today it would've been really rushed in the back half. I would still like to get the video out by or on the 10th, so I'll see if I can keep that promise to myself.

I really like HALF of the video I made. I hate my voice and how I sound, my voice feels like it came from Nyan Neko Sugar Girls. But aside from my awful delivery, I'm pretty happy with the visuals of the video. I'm trying some techiniques that wouldn't have been possible in Sony Vegas, what a terrible piece of software that is. Davinci Resolve is so much better, and I refuse to use any Adobe product so Davinci is hopefully my forever editing software. Even despite my terrible voice, I'm pretty happy with the video. I know that over time and making more videos that I will find a more comfortable recording voice for the future videos.

But the main thing I want to vent about is how creatively unfufilling this year has been. Entirely my fault though. When I compare to pretty much every year since I quit cod in 2018, 2025 has been the one where I played the least amount of new games or hell even watching new things. 2023 and 2024 were amazing years for me in terms of visual novels, those were the years I decided to play the visual novels that just interested me, no overthinking, just doing. And in 2025 the longest visual novel I finished was probably Narcissu, and that was only the first game! Actually I finished Tsui No Sora this year too, but still it was only 7 hours long. I want to get back to the me who finished Tsukihime, Muv Luv, and Clannad within 6 months! What a legend. I was genuinely way happier when doing that too, it's not like I forced myself to "grind" through them.

So my master plan is to play a new game or game I have not yet finished for at least 1 hour every day. So if I were to keep this up for a full year, I would've spent 365 hours on new game experiences at least. That's already probably 200 hours more than what I did this year. This is partially inspired by something I did a couple of months ago where I spent 4 hours a day on "personal work" which I think I mentioned in an earlier blog. I was unemployed back then so I could do that really easily... so I thought. I eventually fell off of it, which I did expect, and I do expect to eventually fall off of this too, but I think I can both keep it up for way longer and make up for it by just doubling the time the next day. It's only a 1 hour minimum thing too, it's not like I'm forced to quit after an hour. This also only pertains to games, so anime, movies, books, or whatever else doesn't count, but I could see myself allowing it.

I'm doing all of this in the hopes of just becoming a more creatively knowledgable person. I don't want to be the Boss Baby guy, I want to genuinely know more about games because it's really fun. Something I probably never thought possible happened last month, I really enjoyed reading a non-fiction book. The MOE Manifesto is probably the most entertained I've ever been by a book. Definately because there are anime girls plastered on every page, but more importantly because of the super unique people interviewed in it. Their knowledge on the whole culture of Otaku's and the history of Moe was extremely engaging to me. I wanted to see Minky Momo before because of the truck thing, but learning even more about it makes me want to watch it even more. I'm a dumbass, but I still do like learning about things. I hope that along with some of the "rules" I laid out for myself and how I want to run my Youtube channel, that the same sense of gaining both knowledge and enjoyment I had reading that book can shine through with the stuff I talk about. Great book, you should check it out, also if you like yuri, the book "By Your Side" by Erica Friedman is really great too.

With that I think I'm done venting for now. I hate making promises I can't keep, or making grand plans where you never even take the first step so, I'm starting the 1 hour thing... I guess today since it's midnight. And even though I hate my voice, I think I muster up the motivation to complete the editing for the Why Do We Love Anime Gynoids video. Since appearantly 2 people have read my previous blog before and watched my Fortnite video (god that's embarrassing). Instead of asking you to watch a video of mine, I found a really lovely Madoka Magica song from the PSP game that I really love and have been writing to this whole time. it's a really nice song :)